While in college I swore to myself never to sh-t using a public toilet. But all things changed when I became a member of the so-called working class. And because I am now an office-based employee, I know I can no longer keep that promise. There were numerous times that I have given up my poise to the common inidoro. I released instead of retained, sit and didn’t squat. Until the supposed privacy of defecating became very much of a public act.

Yup, this topic is too appalling to talk about. Being part of the corporate world, it has been an unwritten understanding to keep bowel issues among ourselves. It can be compared to discussions about salary. You always think about it, you want to talk about it, yet it was not spoken of.

I know most of you would agree to just flush this topic down the toilet than discuss it publicly. But I believe that the subject is worthy to be blogged about. Pooping is very much a part of our natural life, especially for us employees who are basically spending more than half of our lives in the office, an occasional trip to the CR cannot be avoided.

Yep, those trips to the CR: The nature of taking a pee to relieve our bursting bladder. The gross releasing of brown submarines in the bowl and fervently wishing there won’t be any MacArthur experience.

The office CR has always been a very awkward place to defecate. Once we’re on the throne, we want to immediately get it over with. Why? Because the place itself presents a lot of opportunities to produce very embarrassing moments.

Just this morning, I was in the CR at the same time with our Sales Director. What if I heard him make a very loud, disgusting farting sound? What if he forgot to flush the toilet and I got a bird’s eye view of his load because I followed him next to the cubicle. Will I think of him differently? Wil I look at him the same way again? No doubt about it. Luckily, none of these happened.

In the Philippines, a building in Makati, 6750 if I’m not mistaken, provides separate CRs for executives, besides the usual gender segregation. Maybe the building planners recognized the inherent awkwardness inside the rest room. By creating separate CRs for bosses, awkward moments between subordinate and superior are alleviated.

As for me, I have already adjusted to the office CR situation. What I do is I go out of my way and proceed to another floor’s CR, where I am a stranger and there is very low traffic.